Archive for July, 2006
To Settle or Not To Settle
Is settling down, by it’s very nature, settling for less than perfect and if so is there anything wrong with that?
There’s the idea that if you’re not waiting for the absolute perfect Mr. Right then you’re getting into a relationship just for the sake of being in one.
Now before you all go off on tangents about true love and the evils of needing a man to be happy, hear me out. Life isn’t perfect and people aren’t perfect.
Webster’s defines settling down as, ‘taking up an ordered or stable life’. I understand that commitment is not for everyone nor is it what everyone wants.
If you take an honest look at what you want and what’s going to make you happy; what’s wrong with finding someone else with the same desires who’s going to love you but might not be your ideal man?
Lately, it seems like the only thing my friends talk about is relationships. Who’s in one, who’s tired of theirs and who wants one. Those of us in relationships are ready to get out of them and the single guys are ready to settle down. None of us can agree on why we aren’t satisfied with our current relationship status. The only consensus seems to be that we are all ready for a change.
I tend to wonder if it’s not something specific about gay men that makes this such a difficult personal decision. My thought today was that straight people often choose spouses who are not ‘their type’ and marry quite happily. Is it just that they have a better handle on the realties of building a life with a partner or because they have the support/pressure to do so?
I’d really like to hear your thoughts, stories and suggestions. Personally, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with settling down if that’s what you really want.
Hurry! Get Your Cop-Killer Burgers While They Last!
Yesterday must have been a slow news day or something. I was watching the 5 o’clock news and they did one of those local interest pieces on the “Bucky” burger. Apparently, it can only be found at Grandma’s Family Kitchen in Cassadaga, NY.
What famous person is this culinary creation named for? You might be surprised to learn that the inspiration for this new menu item is Ralph “Bucky” Philips, a prison escapee, who shot and seriously wounded a New York State Trooper on June 10th.
In recent weeks, State Troopers have inundated the town, searching for Philips. According to residents, this is causing annoying disruptions to local life. Can you believe that? They are disrupting local life, in a town of 656, over the search for someone who shot one of those who protect and serve. The nerve of those Troopers!
Here’s a fact for you. Since Jan 2000, 112 law enforcement officers have lost their lives in the line of duty in New York State. Seven of those happened this year alone. Their average age? Thirty-Three.
During her on air interview the owner states that she named the burger to “lighten the mood in town”. So this was her solution? She couldn’t do any better than that? If you want to poke fun at the Troopers how about something like a, ‘Statie-plate’ instead of promoting a cop-killer(and turning a profit).
The worst part is that the burger is selling like mad. Which prompts me to ask, what is wrong with these people? For those of you wondering what a “Bucky” burger is, it’s a bacon cheeseburger with mustard and ketchup. Pretty original, eh?
Support the men and woman of the New York State Police
For more information about the case go to America’s Most Wanted
Another Pride come and gone…No! Wait, I’m not ready to let go!
by Scott L. <as published in The Empty Closet>
This year, I marched with Rainbow Seniors in the Pride Parade. Led by flower power marchers, with their homemade tie-dyed shirts, and our Psychedelic shack, Rainbow Seniors proved that you can rock out pride at any age. Some very dedicated members dressed in costume, despite the heat, and played the Laugh-In characters Ruth Buzzie, Artie Johnson and Da Judge. We even managed to win one of the parade awards! How’s that for groovy?!
As we made our way along the parade route, I saw many friends and acquaintances, of course, but hundreds of unfamiliar faces as well. I always wonder where all these LGBTI people disappear to after Pride weekend? I was disappointed to see the usual protestors twisting words of peace into words of hate. At the same time, I was heartened to see the churches of our straight-allies, right next to them, supporting us.
Many of you saw me at the picnic asking you for your money. Almost everyone I spoke to generously parted with it, a fact I greatly appreciate! You all listened to me talk about RSWNY and the community dance coming up October 28th, something I appreciated almost more than the money(almost!) Speaking of money, Thomas Dupuis, of Rochester, won $176. That means we raised $176 for Rainbow Seniors. Thank you all for your continued support!
My favorite thing about Pride? No, it wasn’t the beads or the explosion of rainbow products. I love the unity, the freedom and that warm-fuzzy feeling you get for your community. It’s like Christmas for Gays! After all, it’s the one time of the year when everyone is ‘family’ and we all get along. Wouldn’t it be nice to have that feeling all year ’round? The best way to hold that pride in our hearts is to build something to be proud of.
One phrase I heard over and over Pride weekend was, “Rainbow Seniors? You’re not a senior. What are you doing with them?” The answer is simple. No, I’m not a senior. Anyone at least 21 yrs and over may join or volunteer with Rainbow Seniors. At twenty-eight, I’m with RSWNY to build my community and to improve the future for all LGBTI’s here in our area.
Ageism, in the gay community, is a curious animal to me. I can somewhat understand it from the younger crowd, who may have some maturing still to do, but I hear many 40’s-50’s folks say ’senior’ like it’s a dirty word. In a community where our ranks have been decimated by an epidemic, which we have yet to conquer, we should be thankful for every elder we have.
I am very proud to be part of a group like Rainbow Seniors. They strive to bring together the generations of our community and work toward a better future for us all. Growing old is a part of life, for all of us, no matter how much we fight it.
For more information on Rainbow Seniors of WNY please contact Scott L, who currently serves their Public Relations and Marketing Chair.
